20
Feb

Every Long Island Marshalls, Ranked (Nos. 10-1).

New to the list? Check out part one of the Marshalls countdown (nos. 21-11) here.

10. Oceanside

oceanside

F. Scott Fitzgerald said “It is sadder to find the past again and find it inadequate to the present than it is to have it elude you and remain forever a harmonious conception of memory.” What a fitting quote to describe the Oceanside Marshalls.

In 2003 I bought a heavily discounted pair of Diesel jeans here, size 28wx30l (Ugh, I know! Kale cleanse, please!) on the Final Clearance rack. The jeans helped me through my formative college years until they were tragically cut short after a misguided “lets turn these full-length jeans into cutoff jean shorts” phase in 2006.

I haven’t been back to the Oceanside Marshalls since. I don’t know if I’ll ever return. Its pristine, preserved memory is enough for it to reach No. 10 on our list.

C’est la vie.

9. Elmont

elmont

Certainly a Marshalls to watch in 2015.

Buzzing jewelry and haircare sections distract from a chaotic Ladies’ footwear department. Yes, the HomeGoods annexation seems forced, as it has been known to do, but it doesn’t rub it in the consumer’s face the same way the Lawrence Marshalls (No. 20) does. Here we find a harmonious balance between throw rugs and beauty displays that won’t have shoppers scratching their chins.

If some necessary maintenance work is done to build a fully realized Petites department, there’s no doubt this Marshalls will have a firm foothold in the top 5 by 2016.

8. Melville

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All too often, I hear fans of davidhenne.com complain about the financial struggles facing all Marshalls near shopping malls. There’s no room for the two to coexist! What are we to do? 

Folks, please remember that each Marshalls, from conception to construction, is erected after careful consideration. Melville Marshalls knew precisely what it was getting into. Woes over shopping-mall proximity are a bunch of bollocks. If a Burger King and McDonald’s can coexist on the same corner of nearby Route 110 and Jericho Turnpike, there’s no reason why shoppers can’t dabble in both Marshalls and the Walt Whitman Mall.

As my DPHS Class of 2001 yearbook quote states: “You simply cannot overdo bargains.”

7. Carle Place

carleplace

Multiple Diesel sightings in the last year make this reviewer speculate if Carle Place manager Genevieve Porter formed a special arrangement with local distributors.

Though there are plenty of designer labels, shoppers certainly won’t be seeing “red” as the clearance section is a bit sparse. Makes sense, considering how fast the clothes fly off the shelves.

Nevertheless, try heading over during the February-March months, when the winter wear is just worn in enough to get knocked down in price, but sweaters haven’t yet been destroyed due to hanger overexposure.

6. North Massapequa

massapequa

The North Massapequa Marshalls (“North Mass,” to the uninitiated) isn’t what you’d expect from a Top 10 Marshalls. North Mass is an oft-forgotten site that many fans expected to see near the bottom of our countdown. Au contraire. The tucked-away locale offers shoppers exactly what true Marshalls enthusiasts need: under-appreciated brands, and overstocked inventory.

While North Mass doesn’t have any of the glitz and glamor of our other Top 10 entries, it does has a heavy dose of personable staff and expansive styles.

The community seems to have written off this location for the Famous Footwear and Burlington Coat Factory across the street, so you’re likely to find that perfect pair of jeans in your size within minutes — not to mention that adorable top in just the right color.

North Mass Marshalls loses vital points due to its hard-to-reach parking lot off Route 107, but makes up for it with sizable dressing rooms. At North Mass, every fitting room is handicapped-friendly with a fully functional curtain.

How many items are you trying on? Comfort doesn’t count as one, but if it did… 😉

5. Massapequa

marshallsicecream

While not a Marshalls in the traditional sense, Marshalls Ice Cream Bar of Massapequa is a worthy addition to the countdown.

Great deals on designer ice creams like Bear Claw, Turtle Tracks, and Mousse Trail make the creamery a must-taste destination for shoppers. The lack of American Eagle graphic tees is a big letdown, but if you ask, you can try on different ice cream flavors and see how those fit.

A snug interior is a bit disappointing for Marshalls shoppers used to grandiose floor plans. However, the intimacy does offer direct access to the freezers, which are fully stocked with flying saucers and delicious pints.

4. Manhasset

manhasset

Has a giant leg-up on the competition due to its prime location on the Gold Coast. Old money established the Manhasset Marshalls as a go-to site for billionaire playboys and struggling models alike in decades past. A rumored sighting of local celebrity Dan Young only boosts this Marshalls’ standing.

If you’re looking for pageantry, elegance and style, this Marshalls will not disappoint. A high turnover on inventory means you’ll miss out on clearance deals, but you’ll always find the latest (2011-2014) fashions on the rack.

Only lacking in one department — not Menswear, not Intimates, but culture. All the money in the world can’t buy this location the true feel of a Top 3 Marshalls. Still holds strong at No. 4, however.

3. Miller Place

freeport

What we’ve witnessed over the last two years is a return to normalcy for the third-best Marshalls on this list.

In the chaos of the early aughts, Miller Place shoppers were greeted with aggressive styles. An abundance of “Hurley” and “Quiksilver” items made the location a danger to impressionable males aged 10-45.

What’s happening now is a complete tonal shift. Cashmeres and ornate threads made in the US, designers not limited to Marc Antony, a firm grasp on the relevant. Miller Place is telling its shoppers “Yes — we still sell those hideous pullover fleeces from Izod and South Pole. And Yes — you’re going to have to flip through a dozen pastel-colored skinny Levis before you find a proper pair. But guess what? They’re in your size.”

Unfortunately absent are the expired bags of gourmet potato chips for sale near the cashier stations. Old bags of chips near the checkout line is a must, Miller Place, if you ever want shoppers to take your Marshalls seriously.

2. Huntington

huntington

Nothing makes me more furious than the Huntington Marshalls. It does its job so damned well. And it doesn’t even know it. And that drives me insane.

It’s the subtle allure of the Huntington Marshalls that makes it irresistible. As we already know, confident, cocky Marshallses ultimately fizzle out (i.e. North Babylon, West Islip, Lynbrook). When you can demonstrate how fantastic you can be without having to scream it from the Ed Hardy display, you’re doing it right.

Huntington Marshalls has a distinct style all its own. The only reason it hasn’t nabbed the top spot on our list is because I bought an Express thermal shirt there last week only to discover there was a hole on the back of it. Not cool, Huntington Marshalls. You’re still a self-styled Lothario of bargains, but not cool.

1. West Babylon

westbabylon

What more can I say about the West Babylon Marshalls that hasn’t already been tweeted?

Full disclosure: I drive to the West Babylon Marshalls on most of my lunchbreaks – I was there this morning, as you can see from the timestamp. Not shopping, just making my rounds with Douglas in Menswear, Michelle in Accessories and Evelyn The Dressing Room Attendant.

I like to drop by most days, bring some Starbucks and Dunkin’ to the staff, and shoot the shit.

Not every Marshalls experience is about bargains. Just as in life, sometimes you have to step back and say “If this isn’t nice, than I don’t know what is that a Buffalo by David Bitton jacket marked down to $20?”


 

Do you have a Marshalls in your state or prefecture that makes you swoon? Sound off in the comments section below! Susan and I will plan our spring break around these locations accordingly.

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